Embracing a Zen approach to clutter

Have you ever felt that certain corners of your house, certain areas of your life, need to be cleared before you can move ahead? In eastern philosophies the physical is a manifestation of the mental plane. Blocks of any sort, cause energy to stagnate in a never ending cycle.
Have you ever walked into a room with tall cupboards, full of books and objects in every corner? Do you feel the walls and things closing in from all around, crowding out your very presence?
There are those who will tell you that if any corner of your life is cluttered and blocked, you will be locked in a permanently stalled position; not able to move forward or back. If you recognize the situation, then the next step is to look for a remedy and allow a new force to unleash in your life. It can all start very unconsciously.
You look at a pretty thing on the store shelf. That’s it! Your mind is set, and you have to have it. The thrill of buying and stuffing ever-crowding spaces is a momentary pleasure, lasting at its best, a day or a week.
After moving homes three times, and having experienced the agony of sorting, not finding things I know I have and need urgently, paralyzing my weak-willed mind on numerous ‘to-throw-or-keep’ decisions, and shoving away piles of clutter to be dealt with later (A date, incidentally, that never really does arrive), a new understanding has finally dawned upon me. There has been a gradual transition to a more Zen like philosophy of living. An appreciation of the idea that less is more.
Shopping therapy has been replaced with window shopping. Now it’s more fun to admire the beautiful decorative objects sitting on store shelves, and then put them right back on the shelf, where they truly belong.
However if something fancy keeps beckoning, then let it go for the moment. Look at the empty spot in your home or life that could be filled and visualize it from several angles. Run it over through the mind. Allow yourself to pass by the shop several times and look at the item, all the while resisting the impulse to buy it. If the beckoning is strong, steady and unwavering over time, then buy it. Otherwise, let it go; it never really did belong.
Now you know, the object really belongs and was not a result of an impulsive act of shopping. Another benefit of not buying mindlessly is that you will drastically cut down on dealing with pain. The constant pain of parting with something you have, but did not need in the very first place.
Retirement is a good time to take stock of your position and possessions. Answer the questions:
A. Where are you today?
B. And where do you want to be in the future?
Now examine the gap. What is cluttering your path from A to B?
Open space is a very important concept in Zen philosophy. It is space that allows you to breathe mentally and physically. Start out in the physical world –go through your possessions, make a list of why you are hanging on to it.
• Is it a memory you are hanging on to?
• Is it something you have forgotten you even had?
• Is it something you mistakenly thought would be useful to your daily living?
• Is it a valuable, precious item; an heirloom, something to be passed on to a future generation? (Then keep it).
Do you feel by giving away something you have not used in the last six months, that you are wasting your hard-earned money?
Well, good. Awareness is the first step. You can probably learn more about yourself from your unnecessary possessions than from the things you need and use daily. Put away your list and go over it again after several days. Now tick off the things you are ready to eliminate. These are the things that have been cluttering your life. Take a good look at the things you should avoid impulsively buying in the future. Redirect your future purchases into things you would cherish and never regret doing. Things that could enhance:
• Health
• Togetherness
• Fun and laughter
• Happy memories
In Zen decor, empty space is more important than occupied space. Zen décor is defined more by space and light. The feeling of flow and continuity is very important. A Zen look is tranquil, but never boring.
There is a story of a professor meeting Nan-in, a Japanese master during the Meiji era, wanting to learn about Zen philosophy. The master poured tea into a tea-cup even after it was full. After several seconds of watching the overflowing tea, the visitor exclaimed, “Why are you still pouring?” The Master replied, “You can learn nothing until you empty your cup.”
There is only so much you can fill a space with, before the space is overwhelmed by overload. Let your empty spaces guide you to their needs. Let the spaces define an object and frame it like it belongs.
If there is any moral to the story, then throwing and discarding is as important as buying, if not more. Don’t allow clutter to strap your life, open your spaces and mind to living life in the now.

So, The World Did Not End Today

Is 2012 really the Mayan year when the world was to end? Maybe it’s the year to start on your new self?

I didn’t think it would. The year 2012 has made headlines in the media as a critical year- either the world would end, or it will transform and this maybe your last chance for mass migration of souls to a higher realm. Or…… risk being left behind! There is tremendous new age spiritual emphasis and workshops on engineering a change so that none are left behind.  And for a while the idea was fixating to me as well.

The possibility of an end in 2012 has succeeded in creating a hysteria of sorts. People worried if they will get closer to God in time or be left behind. It even affected their daily patterns of living and drives. This would in turn create pressures that sometimes succeeded in unhooking seekers from their current realties. All of the above maybe true, maybe the world could have ended or most probably will transform, but I disagree on the sense of urgency and the need to drop everything around you.

First of all, I don’t think there ever was a time in history when spirituality was not important to our own growth. I think we are born, so we can participate in our own evolution. Each lifetime we should be able to exit with more virtues in hand, than what we were born with.

Also, life was a way of taking care of itself. If the world needs to end, it will. And it will regenerate too, if that is what is ahead. This has happened many times. If you look at the evidence from a scientific and archeologically point of view: the dinosaurs were completely wiped out and yet we have a full and flourishing world in 2012.  Couldn’t be busier!

If you look at it from a mythological and religious point of view: all cultures have survived the great flood as well. Remember the stories of Noah’s Ark or the Hindu avatar of Vishnu as Matsya to save the pious at a time when the whole earth mass was submerged under water? So whatever force was in charge of ending the world in 2012 probably knows how to get it to regenerate and repopulate again. So in other words, the end in 2012 should not be our individual concern. But what should be our concern is how much closer are you getting to your ideals day by day?

Spiritualism is much like the conflict between communism versus capitalism: should I lead others into the light, or shall I lead myself into the light? Communism with its lofty ideals, failed because everyone was supposed to take care of others, other than themselves, which nobody did and so it caved in. But capitalism works with a fundamental aspect of man: that man works best for his own interest. And when everybody works for their best interests in a liberating environment, then sooner or later everyone starts to flourish. This would explain the outstanding economic prosperity of countries that embraced capitalism. Much like that, if each of us were to pursue our own spiritual well being, it would not be surprising that the world is in fact transformed in 2012!

Spirituality can be pursued in temples and churches, caves and forests. But it can be pursued in the home, amongst the family and work life too. The key is to monitor your feelings, your dreams and ideals, and most important of all, is the application of awareness. In today’s lifestyle I feel there is incredible awareness of what is going on outside: media, celebrities, facebook, CNN, latest gadgets, the latest car, the latest hit single impinge on our senses 24/7.  But there is very little awareness on the state of our inner world. And as a consequence there is far less connect with everything intimate with us:

• How is your health?
• How do you feel?
• What are your relationships like?
• Are you feeling peaceful?
• Did you start working on your dream?
• Did you listen to the dreams of your family and friends?
• Do you derive satisfaction from your work?
• What is stopping you? Why is it stopping you?

Are you getting closer to satisfaction and peace in your work, with your child, spouse, health, friendship, activities? Or, are you quietly treading the grind, diverting the internal restlessness with chatting, internet browsing, television soaps, shopping?  We can only discover spirituality through our problems and our individual problems are all around for us to look into. If you have a life, then you sort it….and that is your prayer.

Forgiveness Therapy

The quality of mercy is not strain’d,  It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven
Upon the place beneath. It is twice blest: It blesseth him that gives and him that takes.

By Shakespeare in The Merchant of Venice

 

You know what I like about the power of forgiving? That it is such a powerful healer. It heals first who forgives, and later that who was forgiven.

But I will be the first to admit, that to get to that point where you can successfully release and discharge major hurts and grudges can be one of the most difficult things to do. It can be pretty much like climbing the Mt. Everest. Few attempt the challenge, and fewer reach the peak. But those that do are rewarded by a release like no other. There you can breathe in the rarefied, pure air and look around at your world with baby, new eyes.

The opposite of forgiveness- anger is powerful in itself as well. Anger can take on a life of its own. Once you dwell in anger you can kiss goodbye to any sovereign decisions, perceptions or judgments. It is well known that anger clouds the judgment. It is the cloud that prevents you from seeing anything different, or objectively. You may have been wronged, you may be justified in your anger, you may be full of righteous fury.…..But, you will not heal.

There are two levels of forgiveness..

First is the superficial. You try and put everything aside. This may include rationalizing, becoming neutral, suppressing the feelings, being outwardly polite, or even forgetting. But the body knows otherwise. When in this mode, the mind will say one thing, but the body language will contradict. This could include stiffening, grimacing, making excuses, avoiding contact, biting back feelings, or a rush of negative thoughts. All tactics are designed to hold back your true feelings. In unguarded moments, there is a flash flood of anger. This type of feigned forgiveness helps nobody, except to help maintain outward decorum and peace.   A whole lifetime can pass by holding up your grudges within.

Feel the feeling completely…then let it go…

The second level of forgiveness is the more rewarding mode. This would require two preconditions: a determination to heal, and therefore engage in the act of forgiveness, the other is honesty. Now the good thing about forgiveness therapy is that it can be undertaken alone, if you would rather not face the person or event in question.  Meeting and expressing your feelings after forgiveness with the person would be ideal, but not necessary. This exercise can be undertaken solitarily.

The way to go about it is to ensure quiet time alone. Make sure you will not be startled by noise or someone’s presence. Now bring the person or incident in front of your mind’s eye and allow yourself to feel the feelings. Keep a watch on your mind and thoughts. At this the time the mind will launch into a barrage of stories. Tell your mind, to put everything aside and that you will come back to it. (The mind is like a petulant child ready to throw attention tantrums and this is a tactic to throw the mind off-track.)

The real healing is done with the body. Now watch the feelings. Where is it in the body? Is it in the chest, stomach, throat, shoulder, head or where?  What does it feel like? Knotty, fiery, cold, lumpy, restricting or what? Keep watching, let the feeling grow and take its own course. Once it starts to die out, let it go. Tell yourself, you are ready to forgive completely and absolutely.

Open your palm, and imagine you have been carrying a boulder of anger. Let it roll away.

This is the start. If you can do this repeatedly, you will have pulled the thread that will unravel the balls of anger or hurts. And you are now on to a journey of forgiveness. It must be emphasized that forgiveness therapy is like chipping away at a block. It will not hack the whole trauma away, unless you are very lucky and experience a full on. Such an experience is more likely to happen with special techniques and under the guidance of trained healers. However, it can be done on your own as well.

You might be wondering how this works? Arthur Janov an American psychotherapist and creator of the Primal Therapy, suddenly understood the importance of releasing suppressed emotions one fine day when:

During a therapy session, Janov heard what he describes as, “an eerie scream welling up from the depths of a young man lying on the floor”. From that insight developed the primal therapy in which clients are encouraged to re-live and express what Janov considers repressed feelings. “During a primal, one makes contact with a past memory and the feeling connected with it, and has the experience of descending. A person “goes with” the feeling, lets it expand and become “big,” surrenders to it, and gives in to her body-movements. At the conclusion of a session, the person has the sense of having truly made contact with their feelings–and thereby with their real self. The insights that then emerge are experienced as solid and indisputable.”

Forgiving does not mean saying the other is now ‘right’, nor does it lessen their wrong. Forgiveness only means freeing yourself from your pain. People on a journey of forgiveness have healed themselves of chronic illness and some medical therapies also revolve around forgiveness to affect cures.

The journey of forgiveness is not an easy one, nor is it by design, intended to be. But it is a rewarding one. One that could result in greater health, lightness, peace of mind and freedom for the self.

My experience with a solar cooker

Way back in 1993, I was servicing government accounts for my employer, Indian Express Newspapers, in Bhopal, India. Urja Vikas Nigam, an organization dedicated to promoting solar energy was one of my clients. UVN made and sold suitcase box-sized solar cookers that came with four blackened cooking containers. At that time going “green” or adopting eco-friendly practices was nowhere the talk of the day.

I remember being intrigued by this cooking devise, and the ability to cook without depending on modern amenities. I especially thought of it as a great concept for the rural poor, as that would alleviate the need to procure other types of fuel. If not eliminate, at least minimize.

Well, I finally bought the box with an attached mirrored lid and lugged it up four flights of stairs onto our apartment roof top. First it just lay around forlornly. However then I hit upon the idea, of prepping the dish of the day on the regular, ‘modern’ stove and then putting it in the round, black containers inside the solar box. I would position the mirror and leave for the day. The boiling Indian summers were a boon to solar cooking. The good thing about solar cookers is that after it is done cooking; it stays very hot, but does not burn. However if you have a rainy, or cloudy day then your lunch would remain uncooked.

I’d come home to lunch, pick my tray and bring down the steaming containers of potato and pea stew, lentils and rice. Once I impressed my father-in-law by disappearing to the rooftop and reappearing within minutes with steamy, hot food. I have made cakes, rice dessert, roasted peanuts, and speeded up pickling in the solar cooker. The only flop I experienced was a cake that did not rise, because we opened the solar cooker to check how it was doing. In a solar cooker you leave it till done, or overdone!
Just prep, pack and forget it. It was kind of fun.

Like a traditional oven, but without a worry!!

I always thought of it as a cool concept, but I seemed to be the only one!

Are you carrying emotional dis-ease?

If you look closely, everything in nature is recycled. What is born, is either transformed, or dies. And the leftover material is used to build something new. Rain becomes rivers, and the ocean becomes rain. Living matter returns to the soil, and saplings grow once again. Even planets and stars are recycled into new heavenly bodies. There is a constant rhythm of construction and renewal. Things that do not decompose, like landfills filled with plastic and machines are like a sore thumb that neither get restored nor reabsorbed. And instead, even interfere with the surroundings to maintain and renew itself.

So what does that have to do with emotional baggage? Like everything, we are all subject to events, experiences and traumas that get emotionally buried. These emotional events are important, as they hide within itself lessons we need to master. But when it is ignored, then it stays buried, and festers.

Emotional baggage occurs when we experience a hurt within a relationship and that hurt is not resolved or dealt with. We then internalize those negative feelings and develop fears that we may or may not be aware of. When we then go onto the next relationship, these same fears and negative emotions trigger negative or irrational thoughts and behaviors within us. These behaviors then have a negative impact on the new relationship. Instead of protecting you from having the original hurtful experience repeat itself, these behaviors can actually cause that experience to recur time and time again. The fears and hurt feelings only then grow and now become justified within your own mind as correct. This creates a cycle that you then feel unable to escape from in your life.

Our adult relationships revolve primarily around the significant other, followed by the extended family and work place relationships. Psychologists have discovered that adult relationships are preprogrammed patterns. Subconscious patterns are sown when we very young: preschoolers, toddlers or even earlier. Our instinctive reactions and thoughts for our birth family members get so set that it seems like a natural occurrence. And are not perceived as a reactive force, which it actual is, crystallized at the moment of occurrence. Most of us will never even see or sense a pattern until we go determinedly looking for it. But just like a non-renewable landfill, the buried emotions do nothing to your past or future relationships. It just sits there buried and festering.

Many alternative healing systems believe that the origin of current physical diseases starts with emotional dis-ease. Homeopathy for instance, takes into account the emotional constitution of a person for effective treatment. In Traditional Chinese Medicine there is a direct relationship between the emotional life of a person and their physical health. Each organ is associated with a range of emotions. These organs dominate the expression of particular emotions and they are in turn are affected by these same emotions. The emotions exert a negative influence only when they become too intense, strong, unexpressed, excessive or when they dominate the psyche over a long period.

So what can you do to release and detox old emotional hurts, grudges and patterns? Louise L. Hay in Heal Your Body has identified the mental cause for each disorder. Anger turns into things that burn, boil, or infect the body. A pattern of criticism can turn into diseases like arthritis. It makes me wonder if my lower back pain is a result of my lifelong attitude towards money matters. She advocates positive affirmation, to the point, that even your organs start believing the affirmation. I find chanting affirmations all day infinitely, a stoical joyless task. But nonetheless, it could work better as a supplement to a belief- altering exercise. Hay’s book could be a great starting point for examining existing beliefs and thought patterns in the first place.

I have found the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) abundantly found over the internet, relieves my daughters stress just before exam time. I have also found it effective to relieve pressure from a bout of anxiety.

However, for longer lasting relief, that has included attitude change and relief from habitual negative emotional reactions to established relationships, I have found Brandon Bay’s therapeutic exercise at the end of her book in The Journey to be pretty effective. Although drained after the exercise, I felt a weight had lifted off my shoulders. A weight I did not even know existed!

According to Brandon, this exercise should be conducted regularly, so that emotions accumulated can be routinely discharged. An effective emotional cleanse requires a safe, non-judgmental environment, an inner honesty, maybe some sighing and crying. So what happens after a deep successful emotional cleanse?

First of all, you can feel emotionally drained; you will also feel lighter mentally or physically, or both. Your world (I prefer mental outlook) might seem refreshed,  like the  sun is peeping out just after a heavy burst of rain. And in the days to come you will be surprised by happy changes in your life. You might observe an unexpected change in the way you relate. There are a host of other therapies out there, such as herbal therapy, acupuncture, Asian bodywork therapy, hypnosis, yoga that help restore long-standing emotional disharmony. Some make a difference indirectly and take longer; others are more direct and immediately impacting. The good thing about emotional therapies, is that you only have to do half of the effort. The other half unfolds itself in strange and wonderous ways.

I have, through personal experience found, it to be a much superior method to mental therapies- which is basically exhanging thoughts and ideas: could be through a book, person or workshop. While in an emotional therapy- you are experiencing emotions and are in engaged in experiences such as -reliving, pain, letting go, moments of clarity, and renewal of emotions into a more healthy format.

When old emotional hurts and grudges are brought up and released, a space is created for new life patterns. A new bed, nourished with understanding and forgiveness, and watered with love results in  freedom and expansion of the spirit. I agree with Swiss philosopher, poet and critic Henri Frederic Amiel who profoundly observed, “So as long as a person is capable of self-renewal, they are a living being.”

Is that a spoon full of poison or nourishment?

First food for me was just food- a matter of individual taste. Yes, it supplied the five major nutrients important for us to maintain our bodies: carbohydrates, proteins, fats, minerals and vitamins. And calories. Too much food equaled to excess calories which just ended as unwanted body fat.

My youngest sister visit to me in 2000 and her attitude to food started me on a chain of self-discovery. Her emphasis on greens, spinach and avoiding yogurt, and climbing six flights of stairs to maintain her fitness had my curiosity stirred. After following suit and dropping weight effortlessly, my interest in food was piqued and increasingly my time was spent on reading everything about food, without excluding any schools of thought.

How to make food a balm for the body or spirit?

It’s a vicious fight between taste and self-discipline. One road leads to ill health, lower self-esteem and everything downwards. The other road requires exercising care and control, making health-giving choices. This eventually leads to a better mind-body complex and all things good and uplifting.

The funny thing is food can destroy you and lead you closer to the bottom-end. Have you ever gorged on fries and battered chicken and then felt like throwing it all up as your body feels bloated, drained and stuffed? Then you get angry with yourself for overeating once again, look at your image in the mirror and grimace and sink into another cycle of depression and escapism by eating a packet of chips on the couch watching television so that your mind can get away from how you feel? And then walk around with clogged arteries two years later?

I have read somewhere that one of the first baby steps to personal growth and spiritual journey starts with your diet.

I like Elfie Hinterkopf’s , Ph.D. definition of spirituality: a subtle, bodily feeling with vague meanings that brings new, clearer meanings involving a transcendent growth process. She further explains it as “Yes, if I define spirituality as a special kind of experience in which one reaches out to more parts of oneself, others, and life.”

And this paradigm is very much in keeping with what Edgar Cayce discovered through his hypnotic voyages: “For you grow to heaven, you don’t go to heaven. It is within thine own conscience that ye grow there”

Consciously or unconsciously it starts as a journey of self-awareness, exploration, changes. You may have an existing issue that you no longer wish to prolong. It may be excessive weight, an allergy or a serious heart condition. Somewhere deep inside, you decide to take control, instead of letting things slide. You gather knowledge, meet some experts and make changes to your diet, grocery shopping habits, cooking style, and join an exercise regimen. You make progress, and then fall two steps back. Sometimes you make amazing discoveries: you stuck with your two-week exercise goal despite your misgivings and lack of determination, the removal of dairy and gluten stopped the bloating feeling and renewed the energy drive. You feel good and accomplished. Your skin looks better. Nothing could be better, the sun is shining and the world looks good!

It’s a journey of self-discovery! You never imagined that you could love the feeling after a brisk walk and feel a renewed zest to tackle new tasks. Or that you loved making salads, and have become a connoisseur of sorts as you hunt for the freshest ingredients and discover a lip-smacking, healthy dressing after several trials and errors.

Here’s a tip I picked among my readings and used with good results. Edgar Cayce, the sleeping prophet, said freshly juiced celery, lettuce and carrots builds up the immune system. Constantly on the look out for something to improve my twins immunity a decade ago, I gave this recipe a shot. What I did notice was that my kids were not picking up the perennial seasonal viral every school opening season in September. Many times I brushed it away as coincidence. But after reading extensive accounts of people recovering from debilitating and potentially fatal illnesses from juicing, I have finally understood its power. And the reason is very simple – fresh juice carries all necessary nutrients (discovered and undiscovered) plus living chi or prana required by a cell in an instantly assessable form to heal and rejuvenate.

Food is not merely calories and five nutrient groups. Food hides within its folds a world within a world. And maybe your first baby step towards a better you..